Leave a comment



For any person reading here, how I entitled this post and what I am about to write may be a revelation. It could also be an eye rolling – no s@#t sherlock moment. I write from hearing the words that have come out of my mouth, and the mouths of others. The phrase “I am depressed” needs to be distinguished from ” I feel depressed”. It is easy to identify with how we feel. Super easy. However, these are two very different statements  and one, in my opinion, is a misuse of words. It is also an unmistakeable misunderstanding of depression. Being depressed is a static concept, and feeling depressed is something that can change. If healthy, we feel things and they pass through us eventually. Of course, letting go and healing depends on the intensity of a situation. It is  easy to change if we identify ourselves as a fluid individual. For the most part, when healthy, our  lives flow like the element of water that predominates our biological make up. Water is fluid and we are mostly water. Many people do not seem to understand that our biological composition is mostly water. Feelings of things not flowing, sometimes called frustration, are part of a bladder/ kidney/ liver imbalance. This kidney/bladder/water imbalance deeply impacts and creates feelings of physical unease or disease. What does that feel and look like? Well, I most obviously can not answer that for everyone. Most widely shared complaints are bloating, dehydration, aches, tiredness, feeling frustrated and stuck. These are some of the corner stone symptoms that many people experience, and that add to feeling unwell. Often this contributes to feeling depressed, powerless and angry.  What is going on can be summarized by the amount and types of meds that are being peddled all day long through the media and medical professionals by pharmaceutical companies.


I am hoping to help some people open their minds to the idea that no one needs to be embarrassed about feeling depressed. When it has gone on for what seems similar to forever it is easy to identify with the phrase,” I am depressed”. You may have to do some soul searching to remember the last time you felt elated, or at peace with things. If you can not remember, you have a strong reason for healing your bowel and body. The Unique Healing Program is ONE way to do this. Is it the answer for everyone? No, I am sure it is not.  I have been part of The Unique Healing Program for two years. I know first hand nothing is for everyone. That would be a ridiculous and  presumptuous thing for anyone say. However, The UHP is worth researching and learning from. There is information in The Unique Healing Books on depression. Presently there is more information on the web as to the brain – gut connection than there ever has been before. This information is not linked to The UHP in anyway.


In closing, one idea that helped me understand the gut / brain connection was recognizing that the same blood that flows through the bowel and all other organs and extremities flows through and impacts our brain. Improving the health of all our internal organs, with focus on better bowel health, impacts our limbs. When everything is flowing we feel a part of nature and humanity. We stop feeling the world and those who inhabit it are our enemy. Ultimately, peace begins within us and in a very, very  basic way. Complicatedly basic.


Another source for gut health is The Body Ecology Diet by Donna Gates. I highly recommend this book as a source for information on how and what to eat. The emphasis on fermented foods is greatly helpful, but in my experience, not the answer for healing a bowel that is not functioning well, or at all. The Body Ecology Diet can give a better picture of what true gut health is. Using clay is what The Unique Healing Program centers around, and that is the ingredient that The BED is missing. Besides an informative book, Donna Gates does sell herbs, green powders and other adjuncts to her program. Well worth checking out. I have written other posts as to why The BED did not work for me. Please do a search on this site for more info.




I have shared this experience with, I believe, two people involved with The Unique Healing Program besides my husband. One is Donna Pessin. Maybe others will relate, or find some inspiration.

About 6 months into being on UHP I was out for a walk with our dogs. I do not remember how that day started, but I can say mornings are the most difficult time of the day for me, and have been most of my life. This day I had an experience of such joy it was truly remarkable. I wish I could tell you that I took some Colloidal Silver or specific dose of some other elixir that made this happen. Believe me, I would share it in a flash. Something that would regularly clear the cobwebs. and stop me feeling as though I was living in another dimension. Slightly veiled. Twilight Zone-ish. On the edges of depression. Being constantly busy and immersed in the lives of others, while seeking an solution through alternative health avenues is what saved me from taking medications, and distracted me most of my life.

What was different that day? Well, what was above me and all around me, blue sky, bright sun, lots of trees and flowers were my focus and their beauty was undeniable. All that was wrong was not the focus or in the picture. I really felt something that I can say I have never truly felt as an adult. Specifically, I remember thinking that if I never lived another day, that sensorial experience would be enough. I really mean that. May sound crazy, but that is what I remember feeling. I remember thinking of the small children who die early of a rare illness and still have so much joy to give. They must experience that feeling at some point? I don’t know.

I also remember recognizing that what was outside of me was not determining how I felt. I live in the Palm Springs area of California. Sun, blue sky, flowers are an everyday event. It was something within me. This is what I believed to be true, but had not experienced quite like that.

Anyway,since that day I have had snippets of that feeling, but not as profound and as long in span. It was such an overwhelming experience. I am not that sure of how long it lasted. It was wonderfully weird. It lasted for at least as long as the walk, about 45 minutes.I know it is a sign of something I can achieve on a more regular basis. The experience helped me recognize how the world is so deeply colored by my inner terrain. If I had not done all the other things I have over the past 30 and more years, I know I would be so much worse off. I am grateful for the tools I used in the past, however, they did not produce long term healing of my gut, immunes system and entire body.

One year into The Unique Healing Program, my days are still up and down. As I have written before, the downs are less strong and don’t last as long. My mornings, especially this spring, has been pretty overwhelming at times. The big difference is that I tend to come out of it more quickly and more highly functional. I am seeing a pattern of clearing the farther into spring things go.

I really hope this post is of help to others on The Unique Healing Program and inspires people to explore UHP and other ways to heal outside the Traditional Medical / Psychopharmacology world of treatment.


Leave a comment



Around mid January of this year I started feeling an ambivalence toward eating that,from past experience on UHP, told me mild nausea may be in my future. I knew Spring might be tough for me and things were starting to come to the surface for spring. Spring Cleaning Post here.

So, I have a pretty unpredictable time since mid- January. I am not presently using UHP Colloidal Silver. I did in the beginning and have written about that in other posts.UHP CS is more potent in smaller doses than the home brewed CS.  I had some idea that if I was not using UHP CS, the stuff we made was a waste of time and I began to use MMS. I have some past posts on MMS and CS.  We do make our own Colloidal Silver and I am sorry I did not start drinking it sooner. But who knows? I feel like a 24 / 7 personal health detective most days. This has been going on for many, many years. Anyway, MMS is effective, but sometimes hard to tolerate.

To get to the point, I am finding some repeat of  symptoms from last spring[other springs] at this time, with many improvements. What is hard is that I so want to feel better. I want to have some kind of  daily pattern of feeling well that I can count on. What I have to remind myself is that before Donna Pessin and The Unique Healing Program I was searching for this pattern, for most of my life, and my gut was worse than it is now. Hard to believe and remember.

I am not good with feeling blocked up. I am learning as I go through this process that many people are just better at dealing with feeling bloated, stuck and trudging on.I am talking mostly about people not on UHP. Prior to UHP I had to eat a very simple diet and rely on other tricks to feel able to be in the world. I knew I just could not cope any longer with the way things were. This was an epiphany I came to  way more than a decade ago, but never found anything that healed my gut. I do write about The Body Ecology Diet in many other posts. BED was one of my hopes to work before finding The UHP. I did BED for three years and it did not heal my gut. Still some good info on The BED site.

It is easy to feel fed up doing The Unique Healing Program. I feel that way and have to give myself a reality check. I felt fed up before The UHP. Why else would I be doing it?  I moved from NYC and stopped at the town of Patagonia, Az.- Tree of Life Center thinking that would be a real helpful jumpstart for my health. I hoped to find a health balance that I could not reach living in NYC my entire life. My path is very, very long and circuitous [decades]. It lead me to The Unique Healing Program and Donna Pessin. I just have to learn to be more patient and that is truly not my strong point.

I have thought I feel really worse at times, but I have to ask myself since when? I did not feel well before UHP. Complaining is not hard to do and I think as the bacteria, fungi, parasites, Candida get pushed out of their homes there is a whole lot of kicking and screaming going on. So, more complaining on my end due to the nasty symptoms. Just a supposition. Sure it is true.

Sick of hearing myself bitch, but understanding why I do. Looking to feel  more grateful. Not easy when I am in the middle of some icky symptoms. If you are reading this post you probably know what I am talking about, whether you are on The UHP or just scoping it out.


Leave a comment



I have easily felt overwhelmed in the last few years, and that overwhelm is  becoming less and less as I am  on The Unique Healing Program. Often I have struggled with waking up feeling like I do not know where to start. This has gone on for many years. I am sure the feeling of overwhelm is widespread. Today, many people feel it is normal. My observation is that people barrel on until something happens that causes them to have to slow down or just plain stop. Awareness and perception is everything and our health really does determine how we see the world. There are exceptions to this, I have known people who are able to maintain a positive frame of mind despite not feeling well, but I think they are the exceptions. The pressure to save face, and the use of anti depressants can mask things, at least for awhile.


In general, my mornings are becoming easier. I feel more positive and can get out of my own way more easily. I experience more of my life without the feeling of living in a twilight zone, surreal existence. Those feelings are really upsetting and completely hindered my ability to be productive. As a Postscript 5/2014: These patterns at times got worse for shorter periods. One step forward two steps back. Then two steps forward one step back. There is real hope.

Brain fog is progressively improving. I do get hit less hard with the ups and downs, but it is not easy to predict. However, the downs are less down and I feel more balanced.

I get annoyed much less easily and am seeing that even though some things could be perceived as annoying, I do not react to them the same way. Okay, some things and people are just plain annoying. What is clearer than ever, and not just words, my response is everything.

I am getting less and less critical of others and myself. Some days are worse than others, but I can stop the pattern more quickly. It is easier to find some kind of peace. I can more easily take a nap, employ Emotional Freedom Technique – EFT, meditate, and pray [my own version].

Hang in there if you are on The Unique Healing Program Donna Pessin. If you are thinking about trying it, I can say go for it. Do it at whatever level you are able.

As a Postscript 5/2014: Really do The Unique Healing Program at whatever level you can. I truly believe one to two tablespoons of clay, a few Bowel Strength and what ever other parts of UHP you can do will help you. Colonics, enemas, etcetera can be really, really helpful when doing UHP on this level. On any level.


Leave a comment


1/2014: I have been on The Unique Healing Program for 9 months and my experience is that my gut is healing and my digestion is improving. I have confidence in my future health and ability to travel and go to social events with more ease. Many people have the digestive woes I have, the difference is they choose substance like Rolaids, Metamucil, Nexium, Senakot, Milk of Magnesia [to name a few] to deal with their discomfort. My awareness of the outcome of  long term usage of  these product helped me make a different choice.Those choices, made decades ago, most definitely were good, but did not ultimately heal my gut.


I have been on a roller coaster of an emotional ride prior to being on UHP and during it. Good news, it gets better! And, you will most probably backslide and feel lousy intermittently. Just being honest.

I have not taken anti depressants during my lifetime. I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE DO!  While on The Unique Healing Program I am experiencing feelings of more gradual emotional stability. The first few months of the program were not easy. Depression from exposure to heavy metals, pollutants, etcetera and the circumstances of daily life can get really muddled. The Unique Healing Program can help people see where that line begins and ends. This takes time. It can be confusing, but that confusion leads to clarity as you go along and notice certain patterns.


I have felt nauseous and then grossed out by the idea of drinking the sodium bentonite/ Body Bentonite clay. There would be days that I did not feel as disgusted. Again, the days where I felt slightly nauseous in the mornings were the hardest. The nausea has become less to zero. Then there is just feelings of frustration. Reflection about money and time spent on diets and supplements that did not work. I think this is pretty normal for people. Looking back can go way deeper than what I just mentioned. This can be a good thing. The UHP begins a healing process on many levels. For me it has been a highly unpredictable trip down memory lane. That trip is definitely not over. I have woken up thinking about some event that happened eons ago. Trippy feeling.

Admitting feeling depressed is not a sign of strength in any  community that I know of  here in the USA. I have visited other countries, but I have not lived in them, so I can only speak from my own personal experience. I have known many people from other cultures. The sense of shame and weakness around depression seems to be universal. Depression is managed here in the USA in a myriad of ways that many people accept as normal. Overindulging in food, alcohol, shopping, work, caffeine, are some of the major players.


To raise the discussion of letting go of the daily consumption of  foods and substances that temporarily mask depression does not win popularity contests in mainstream society. The Unique Healing Program will bring all this to the surface. Dealing with family and friends can be hard. Don’t try to convince them. Okay, so you probably will anyway. After no to few takers, I finally just stopped.


What is different about The Unique Healing Program is that it actually  helps people who feel isolated for a number of reasons be able to rejoin the world. Healing digestion and eliminative processes heals the mind and body. This is not a commonly accepted idea in our world today. It is pretty much unacknowledged.

Sessions with Donna Pessin, creator of The Unique Healing Program, greatly help, but if that is not possible watching the videos many times and reading – rereading the books can work. Many of my questions have been answered in her books and videos. People taking medications, diagnosed illness, drug addictions, etcetera really need to have at least one session with her. It is totally worth it.

There is a light at the end of this, sometimes seemingly endless, tunnel. Donna Pessin has told me that the one year mark really is crucial to get through. This may be different for everyone, but I have a feeling it is a good bench mark for most.

I am writing these posts to let those out there who are on the program, considering it, or wanting to jump ship that it is worth the effort. Do The Unique Healing Program  Donna Pessin at whatever level you can afford, are able and willing to. The handful of people who I have been in touch with through this blog confirm one thing: Although it is not always easy, it is well worth the time and effort.

As a Postscript 5/2014: You will probably want to ditch UHP many times along the way. Do the best you can, and if you need to reduce the clay or stop for a day a week, then do it. Donna Pessin is very pro more clay. This may or may not be good for each person 24/7. Consider giving yourself a break by lessening the amount. See if your bowels stay formed. That is the key. You will know what to do from that result alone, but I would not ditch the clay completely. If you are sick of this whole bloody thing, and who isn’t at times, at least do one or two tablespoons a day for a time.